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[Jace]

Ohhh, opportunism, you glorious, generous mistress...

I shall redirect your reference to opportunism as a mistress towards me and thank you kindly for it. 

[Makoto Priano]

Sure! Just-- before we go any further, do you have any jealous exes I should be aware of?

[Jace]

Only a couple stalkers, so you're all good!  \o/

[Ché Biko]

Ché being a pacifist, he would try to pacify his attacker, prefarably by pinning him/her/it against the ground/bar/security person/device while doing as little damage as possible.

By the way, an incident like the one described in the OP isn't that rare for Ché. He's been attacked unexpectedly on 3 occasions (Nikita Alterana, Ber Kan and Ava Starfire), and while all 3 attacks where technically godmodding, I let that slide and in neither of these events did he respond with violence.
I know, Ché may not be a very good representation for how the average egger may respond to an attack.

[Makkal]

Hiding behind the largest person/object or headbutting/body slamming anyone attempting to attack her.

[Saede Riordan]

Always go for the bar stool.

Most bar stools I have seen are either bolted to the floor or just plain unwieldy. Not very useful, imo. Though if we were to differentiate between the two categories:

Realistic Sitting/Assault Device:
Spend seven seconds trying to lift and get a solid grip on the damn thing, swing and miss (and lose balance quickly because you're drunk), or throw it not as far as you thought it would go and miss (because you're drunk). If successful throw, it probably knocks the other guy over, or doesn't do much of anything. Headshots are ridiculously rare, because of raised-arms reflex.

Fantasy Sitting/Assault Device:
Lift it quickly and easily, and swing it by the legs for wrecking damage, knocking the other guy off his feet or shattering the guy's jaw/ribs. A throw is super effective, and can even attain headshots. Broken bones are to be expected. Loss of balance when swinging/throwing despite being boozed is a sign of incompetence and is almost never depicted.

The Graelyn Device
Hoist the stool over your shoulder and quickly flee the bar with your ill gotten gains.

[purple]

What is the proper way to respond when your character is unexpectedly attacked in the bar, though not in a way that god-mods your character?

Hamish would first make sure the half dozen mountain-o-civire security personnel who accompanied him the bar know not to begin disemowing the offender.   He would then clean himself off, quietly leave and submit the wardec paperwork.

[Norrin Ellis]

After picking himself up off the floor, Norrin would probably seek the nearest mirror to ensure that he hadn't been hit in the face and that his hair remained exactly as it should.

[Lunarisse Aspenstar]

Well.. after ducking (Luna is good at that!) she would immediately, but with as much grace as she can muster and in a prompt but not too hurried way, take evasive action to leave throwing out one-liners on the way out the door.  That actually happened when Lord Zhod's fiancee tried to assault her (where there was no OOC or IC warning!). Alternatively, she would immediately look for male or female capsuleer with strong chivalry instincts to stand behind (I'm looking at you Aldrith and Steffanie and Pieter!).

[Karmilla Strife]

I haz shield.

Karmilla's fine with watching violence, but taking part is just uncivilized.

[Katrina Oniseki]

(I'm looking at you Aldrith and Steffanie and Pieter!).

I feel horribly left out. (((

[Denak Kalamari]

Denak is never drunk even in bars, he would beat the shit out of everyone and emerge victorious.

But seriously said, Denak would rather just leave the bar rather than engage in violence under the guise of 'not worth my time and effort', unless the attacker was being very threatening and/or annoying. Alternatively, he could just look at the throw-ee in a funny way before going back to meddle with his own business.

[Desiderya]

Well, well, if I really would love to godmode I'd try and get a character to use my most favorite Shadowrun augmentation: Pheromones.  Suck it, bitches.

[Ollie]

So let's say your character is attacked in a bar as started in the above post. Let's also assume for a moment that your character is going to fight back. How do they react? Do they get up and start trying to swing? Do they attempt to smash a beer bottle for a cool improvised weapon? Do they pull out a knife that you [didn't] acknowledge the presence of when entering the channel?

What is the proper way to respond when your character is unexpectedly attacked in the bar, though not in a way that god-mods your character?

EDIT: I should point out that when someone pulls a gun and starts shooting in a bar fight, the fight is over real fucking quick, because everyone else without a gun is trying to GTFO before they get shot, and those who do get shot are not getting back up unless they're on meth. Alcohol is not superhero juice.

Well, Kat, you asked for it. 

As Ollie, I'm going to respond with one of these dialled up to the "Shat Into Unconsciousness" setting, call for a recording drone and exit through the nearest door.

Non-lethal and potentially entertaining even if the shot misses the intended target and hits some unfortunate bystander.

Realistic? No, not in the slightest.

But we're playing immortal capsuleers in a far-flung sci-fi universe and death/serious injury really shouldn't hold much fear for us compared with the public humiliation of explosive faecal incontinence to the point of rectal prolapse (if you're fortunate enough to not know what that is or looks like, don't go googling it).

Alcohol is not superhero juice, and what's left on the bar-room floor, walls and ceiling after one of these hits a mark is not superhero juice either.

[Katrina Oniseki]

So let's say your character is attacked in a bar as started in the above post. Let's also assume for a moment that your character is going to fight back. How do they react? Do they get up and start trying to swing? Do they attempt to smash a beer bottle for a cool improvised weapon? Do they pull out a knife that you [didn't] acknowledge the presence of when entering the channel?

What is the proper way to respond when your character is unexpectedly attacked in the bar, though not in a way that god-mods your character?

EDIT: I should point out that when someone pulls a gun and starts shooting in a bar fight, the fight is over real fucking quick, because everyone else without a gun is trying to GTFO before they get shot, and those who do get shot are not getting back up unless they're on meth. Alcohol is not superhero juice.

Well, Kat, you asked for it. 

As Ollie, I'm going to respond with one of these dialled up to the "Shat Into Unconsciousness" setting, call for a recording drone and exit through the nearest door.

Non-lethal and potentially entertaining even if the shot misses the intended target and hits some unfortunate bystander.

Realistic? No, not in the slightest.

But we're playing immortal capsuleers in a far-flung sci-fi universe and death/serious injury really shouldn't hold much fear for us compared with the public humiliation of explosive faecal incontinence to the point of rectal prolapse (if you're fortunate enough to not know what that is or looks like, don't go googling it).

Alcohol is not superhero juice, and what's left on the bar-room floor, walls and ceiling after one of these hits a mark is not superhero juice either.