Who said the contrary ?
There is a huge differentiation that has to be made between the daily lives of our characters, their dreams, their hopes, their struggles, their failures and victories and overall all these little adventures and character fleshing out, and on the other hand them being capsuleers, and such, at the center of the storm. We can argue about semantics all we want, but that will never change the fact that capsuleers are not your average joe, even if they can live their daily lives as plain as the average joe.
And with that in mind, you can perfectly develop a very deep and well thought character with a very active and dense everyday storytelling, evolving, breathing and living (I know since I did that too, like most of you), there will always be the other facet that is missing of the picture : the capsuleer context. And I expect it to have some serious consequences on the former. For example, my character has never felt so plain and complete than when stuff was actually happening in New Eden. It brought a huge deal of self reflections, discussions and character development that was otherwise missing when playing "my daily life". And before you get on your high horses I had my best RP moments with that "daily life" development and certainly not in space. In space sucks for character building RP tbh.
I also agree that it's harming oneself to expect to only have the other half (the latter) too.