((FROM HERE ON OUT WILL INCLUDE SOME PRETTY SERIOUS SPOILERS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.))
I didn't think vampires could be nice, but Serana seems nice. Isran would want me to kill her but she said "If you kill me you've killed one vampire, but if people are after me then there's something bigger going on."
She's got an Elder Scroll too. I've never seen one before, but Mother used to read to me about them so I know what they look like. The fact she's got one makes me think maybe she wasn't lying to me to stop me from fighting her.
Besides, Mother always said that I should trust my in two-ish on intuition about whether people are nice, and mine is telling me that Serana is nice. A lot nicer than, say, that Mr. Nazeem back in Whiterun.
I have no idea why anybody would want to lock a nice vampire with an elder scroll away in a box that can only be opened by pressing a button that sticks a metal spike through your hand. That really hurt! My healing spells come in handy yet again.
She said she has trouble with her Father. "Little girl who doesn't get along with her father... read that story a hundred times" she said. I was going to tell her that I understand but Mother always said you should let people talk about themselves and listen to them rather than interrupt them to tell them about you. She said she'd been locked away in there so long she didn't even know that Cyrodiil is the seat of an empire! That's... I don't know how long that is. I'll have to look it up when we get back to Whiterun. I think I have "A brief history of the Empire" on my bookshelf.
Dimhollow Crypt, in short, was interesting. The other vampires weren't half as nice as Serana , but the crossbow Isran gave me really does work well. I'm getting a lot better with it! and this special Dawnguard war axe and shield made short work even of the really strong vampire who was leading them. And then after I found her we had to fight some draugrs and some statues came to life! They were really tough to kill but I guess they would be because they were made of stone. Serana's spells hurt them more than my sword did. I need to remember that.
And there was another one of those walls with the scratches! This one made me think of the word "gaan". Again, I don't know what it means, but at same time I know that I DO know what it means, it's on the tip of my mind.
Also, it turns out that there's a problem with travelling with a vampire. I'm awake in the day and get tired at night. She sleeps in the day because the sun makes her weak. At least it doesn't make her catch fire like I think it does to most vampires.
Maybe I should just try to stay awake at night and sleep in the day? I mean, if I'm a vampire hunter now then it makes sense to be awake when the vampires are. Lots of people are awake at night and sleep in the day, like city guards and farmers with a sick animal to look after. On the other hand it gets VERY cold at night in Skyrim. A man could freeze to death out here if he's not careful.
I'll take Serana to this old castle out east of Solitude. It's not far from Mount Kilkreath so maybe I can get rid of this "beacon" thing on the way. I slept a lot the last couple of days, I can go overnight tonight. We'll head back down to Whiterun and hire a carriage to take us to Solitude.
*
That fort I cleared out is full of soldiers now! Stormcloaks. That's got to be better than all those bandits, and they let us stay at the Stumbling Sabrecat. I decided I would sleep after all. Serana copes with the sun just fine when she has her hood up, and I can't see in the dark so I guess that solves that problem.
I'm looking back at some of my earlier entries and... it's hard to believe I'm the same man who wrote these. Did I really think that the Imperials nearly executed me because they had mistaken me for Ulfric Stormcloak, rather than just because one captain was too lazy and callous to do her job properly?
Part of me wants to hate the legion for what nearly happened to me but really, it was just one woman and she probably died at Helgen anyway, so she can explain herself to the Divines. Stendarr grant her mercy, because I wouldn't if I were him. I can't blame Hadvar for following orders - he's a good man and I don't know if I would have got out of there and begun to make my way in Skyrim without his help that day.
Anyway, the point is that I don't know how I could have been so... When they hit me on the head and knocked me out on the road across the border to High Rock, it must have taken a while to wear off or something.
Then again... looking back on my life, I don't remember that I ever did much thinking, or felt like keeping a journal. And where did I learn that a Nirnroot is a Chenopodicaea Sinderionii? Let alone how to spell it without this magic quill?
And I'm learning things so fast now. It's so easy! I had to practice for weeks to get that transmutation spell Father taught me to work, but I learned the Healing Hands spell just by reading the book and got it right first time.
It seems like something very strange is going on.
*
We're on the cart to Solitude. I checked my copy of "A Brief History of the Empire" when we got back to Whiterun, and the Empire was founded by Tiber Septim - Talos - in the year 896 of the second Era. Tiber Septim declared the dawn of the third era, which lasted four hundred and thirty-three years. We're now in the 201st year of the fourth era. So, Serana was locked away for at least six hundred and thirty-four years! Probably a lot longer, because she's never heard of Tiber Septim.
And I am definitely getting smarter, because two weeks ago I couldn't have counted to twenty even if I'd taken my boots off. What in Julianos' name is happening to me? How does somebody just get smarter?
I don't think Julianos has a temple in Skyrim, but there's the Temple of the Eight Divines in Solitude. Maybe I'll ask the priest when we get there.
*
The Empire seem to love chopping people's heads off. I hope I never find myself there again. I slept on the cart and in my dreams I could still feel the last man's blood warm and sticky against my neck as I waited for the axe.
I just know I'm going to have the same dream tonight, after seeing that man Roggvir executed.
*
I did dream, but it wasn't about being executed, praise Stendarr. It was just.... strange. A creeping feeling of being watched, and of eyes and... tentacles? And books, and being inside books, not like a character or a word but...
I don't know. Dreams don't have to make sense.
The priests at the temple couldn't help me with the puzzle of why I seem to be getting smarter. They just told me to accept it as a blessing and use it wisely. That seems like good advice. Besides, maybe it'll keep happening and eventually I'll be smart enough to figure it out by myself.
It's not far to Mount Kilkreath. I'm looking forward to being rid of this beacon.
*
Meridia. Somehow, I'd have expected the Daedric prince of life to be nicer. But I guess the entire point of Daedra is that they're not nice, even when they're kind of on your side. Sort of.
There was another one of those dragon word walls near her statue. Another word: "Su". still no idea what it means.
Oh well. If I'm to be rid of the Daedra's attention, I'd best do what she says. Hopefully she'll forget about me once we're done here. I have a necromancer to kill.
*
Dawnbreaker...
I never thought I'd ever SEE one of the legendary Daedric artefacts, let alone wield one.
Daedric or not, it seems like a fitting weapon for a vampire hunter.
But what worries me is that I'm pretty sure that Mother never read to me about Daedra. How do I know so much about them?
It's dark now, but we're not far up the coast from that castle Serana pointed out. At least with this sword in my hand I feel a little bit better equipped to go there.
*
So that was Serana's father. Harkon. Lord of castle Volkihar, and the man behind the attack that killed Adrienne.
He was very grateful to see his daughter returned... though I think that was more because of that Elder Scroll she's carrying than because of love. I think I'll take the random anger of a drunken father who heard voices over Harkon's "fatherly affection" any day. At least my old man knew what he did was wrong, in the end.
He offered me a reward: Vampirism. Sold it well, too - power, the fear of my enemies, never having to be afraid of death ever again. But I've killed enough vampires to know they fear death just like everyone else, and as for the power of it... I don't care for power. I want to live a good life, not a powerful one. I turned him down, and so he banished me. Serana's still in there.
I hope I've not made a terrible mistake by bringing her here, with that scroll. She seemed genuine, but...
I should get back to Fort Dawnguard. It's clear on the other side of Skyrim though, so I think my first port of call is going to be Solitude again. I'll take a carriage after I've had some sleep and a good meal.
*
I took a wrong turn coming down out of the mountains and spent the night at the Four Shields Tavern in Dragon Bridge. Nice place. The owner, Faida, does good food, the bed was clean and comfortable, and the view when I stepped out of the inn just morning was... well, that's quite the impressive bridge they've got there. You can certainly tell how the town got its name.
I could head down to Markarth from here, but that's a long road. I'll head back up to Solitude and take the carriage to Riften like I planned, after offloading all the stuff I found in Dimhollow Crypt and that temple.
*
I'm on the carriage to Riften. it's a long ride, so I've had plenty of time to think. About Serana and whether I can trust her, about the Imperials and the Stormcloaks...
Thinking feels so natural now. Before, thinking was like heaving a heavy barrel up out of the inn's cellar for Mother. I could do it, but it was an effort and left me feeling drained, but she seemed to just haul them up with one hand while serving a customer with the other. Yes, I was small, but that effort of thinking never went away, even when I got bigger and stronger and could haul two barrels up at once.
And I've learned something. I learned that if you just let thoughts bubble around in your head, sometimes they bump into one another and stick together and you can see why they fit. Like, I no longer know that you sharpen a sword by running an oiled stone along the blade, I know why you sharpen a sword by doing that. Mother taught me how to cook and she'd tell me that I had to stir the pot and I never knew why, but Mother said I had to do it, so I did. Now it's so obvious why - to stop the food from burning at the bottom, and to get it heated evenly.
You just have to have the right key, the right little bit to glue one thought to another. And once you've got them, you just need to let them fizz around inside your head until it all comes together and sticks.
*
Still on the carriage. Just remembered something. Serana didn't know there was an empire in Cyrodiil at all. I thought she meant the Empire as in the legion and Tiber Septim and Titus Mede and all that. But that's not the first human empire to be seated in Cyrodiil.
Surely she can't come from a time older than Saint Alessia? How long ago was that? I need to see if the court wizard at Riften has some history books.
*
The guards at Riften, who I used to think just weren't letting me in, were actually trying to shake me down for Septims. They shut up and let me in when I called their bluff. I'd complain to their commander, but the two problems with that are that I don't know what they look like because of their helmets, and anyway I would guess that any city where the gate guards can openly shake down a traveler isn't one where the commander takes corruption very seriously anyway.
At least I'm back in the Rift. Nowhere in Skyrim is as warm as Sentinel used to be, but Riften is about as warm as it gets around here, and after all that snow and ice up in The Pale it's nice to be surrounded by trees that have leaves instead of needles, and not to have to worry that just walking around will cost you a few toes.
The Jarl's court wizard is... interesting. And no help at all in giving me a history lesson. Oh well. On to Fort Dawnguard.
*
Isran chewed me out. He's right, of course - I took a vampire with an elder scroll straight back to her father. There's only one word for that - stupid.
But how can I explain that with every passing day I seem to be getting smarter, without sounding like I'm totally crazy? How can I explain that I only did that because I really was more stupid just three days ago than I am right now?
More to the point, how do I explain that to myself?
Well, Isran still seems to trust me, so he's told me to go find and recruit a couple of his old friends - Gunmar and Sorine Jurard. He told me they should be somewhere near Ivarstead, and in the Reach.
Nice of him to be so precise about it... I'll look for Gunmar first. Ivarstead is closer than Markarth, and maybe somebody there will have heard or seen something about a Nord animal trainer.