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[Lillith Blackheart]

I didn't say it WAS moderated, Silver, I said it is almost as though one is FISHING for things to moderate.

And that connotation is entirely on the reader's head, honestly. The statement taken in context was even said to be perfectly fine. It's when removed from context it apparently was problematic. Anyway, as said I'm not training to crap on anyone, so I will simply restate my intentions one last time in another paraphrase, and then you all can have the last word or not and lock it or not or whatever you opt to do.

In communication there are three things involved. Sender. Message. Receiver.
Communication can break down upon any link of that chain.
If the problem is not that the Sender was Aggressive then the Sender has done their part amicably.
If the problem is not that the Message was Aggressive, then the message is cool.
If the problem is that the Receiver took that something was aggressive out of context. . .

Then requesting that the Sender alter the Message is not the solution. Whether it was a "friendly reminder" or a "moderation action" is not relevant.

That is all. Do as you will.

[Casiella]

As I understood things from the moment I signed up, the guidelines more or less stated outright that we should assume those sorts of phrases carry that sort of connotation. And in fact, that's largely the reason this site exists in the first place.

If one does not wish to communicate in that way, lots of other sites don't mind and take a much more hands-off, light touch to moderation. Backstage exists for those of us that do mind and hope to see a harder line taken on moderation, including explaining to those with more direct communication styles that their words might appear otherwise.

Hav apparently tried to make a gentle reminder early in the process before anything got out of hand. I guess he didn't do so early enough...

[Havohej]

And that connotation is entirely on the reader's head, honestly.

Fundamental difference in outlook.  You are responsible for what you post, not the reader.

[Silver Night]

I didn't say it WAS moderated, Silver, I said it is almost as though one is FISHING for things to moderate.

And that connotation is entirely on the reader's head, honestly. The statement taken in context was even said to be perfectly fine. It's when removed from context it apparently was problematic. Anyway, as said I'm not training to crap on anyone, so I will simply restate my intentions one last time in another paraphrase, and then you all can have the last word or not and lock it or not or whatever you opt to do.

In communication there are three things involved. Sender. Message. Receiver.
Communication can break down upon any link of that chain.
If the problem is not that the Sender was Aggressive then the Sender has done their part amicably.
If the problem is not that the Message was Aggressive, then the message is cool.
If the problem is that the Receiver took that something was aggressive out of context. . .

Then requesting that the Sender alter the Message is not the solution. Whether it was a "friendly reminder" or a "moderation action" is not relevant.

That is all. Do as you will.

That is the rationale people often use to not moderate things, or to hide insults and derision: 'It's not my fault if it's seen as/They didn't mean it to be offensive.'

It is one of the specific things that this forum was designed to remedy. As I said before though, I understand that might not be clear to some people. Since explanations here don't seem to be making any of it clearer, perhaps just wait and see what gets moderated, and that will illustrate things.

As Havo put it (while I was still writing this response: The poster is responsible, not the reader.

That isn't a license for people to use being offended as a weapon - that's why we have moderators to look at things - but it means there is a certain standard for posting. We give people credit for being able to look at their own posts and see where they might cause problems. With that credit comes a responsibility.

If you do have any specific questions, please don't hesitate to ask, though.

[Rodj Blake]

It's far better for a new forum to start off with tough moderation and then let things slack off a little after a while than it is to start off with a lassez faire policy and then try to get tough when the flaming starts.

And now, some delightful kitties.

[Lillith Blackheart]

I know I said I was done with this thread, however I feel compelled to state that I approve of the delightful kitties.

That is all.