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Author Topic: [Story] Odds Against  (Read 905 times)

Aracturus

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[Story] Odds Against
« on: 23 Jul 2010, 05:46 »

This was the end, Mesan was sure of it.
Two hours. After that he would be exposed to the vacuum of space, and he would die. He would lose consciousness within four minutes, and death would follow shortly on its heels. "Well, at least I'm not dieing alone." Mesan thought, looking around at the scared faces of the others. It was dark inside the container, with a tiny box on the roof providing localized gravity.  He gave a reassuring smile to a young woman who was shaking like a leaf, despite knowing that the odds of being rescued were infinitely small. Being an analyst was a curse sometimes. He decided that if he was going to die, he was at least not going to die friendless. Determined, he sat down on the floor of the Cargo Container next to her.
"I'm Mesan." He said.
"L-larissa..." she stuttered.
He smiled comfortingly. As the minutes and seconds ticked by they spoke. He was comforting at first, and she scared, but as their time dragged on they became more and more absorbed in their conversation. It seemed to Mesan that Time itself had slowed down for them, to give him longer with Her. Finally, a sound on the exterior of the container interrupted their conversing. Mesan looked at his watch. Ten minutes! The Container would breach in Ten Minutes! For the first time in his life Mesan regretted. He had found her, and now he would lose her...
"Larissa?" He said, as the others in the container cried and hugged each other. She looked at him and he knew she was thinking what he was thinking. "Look, we don't have much time left, so I just wanted to say that... that I think I-"
He was interupted by another, louder sound on the outside of the container, followed by more sounds. Creaking, banging, and such. He could see where the container was going to breach, and it would be any moment now. He turned back to her as the container was breached and yelled "I LOVE YOU!".
The Container opened, but the vacuum did not come rushing to meet him. His eyes tightly closed, holding onto Larissa, he dared to open one eye. What he saw nearly made him faint with joy. the container doors were open to what appeared to be the hold of a ship, with men in uniforms standing at the opening, looking in with flashlights. He shook Larissa, and she looked up, and feinted in relief. Mesan carried her out of the container as his fellow rescued filed out to meet their rescuers. As he did, he noticed a man who looked to be in charge, as the other were constantly stopping and saluting as they went by. He was dressed in an old Caldari Navy Uniform. It took Mesan a moment to realize that it was not a man, but a holo-projection of one. He had been rescued by a capsuleer.

Years later, when Mesan and Larissa married, Mesan ensured that that man was his best man.
« Last Edit: 25 Jul 2010, 17:35 by Aracturus »
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Milo Caman

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Re: [Story] Odds Against
« Reply #1 on: 23 Jul 2010, 15:38 »

Interesting take on container mechanics in EVE  :P I quite liked it, although your writing style could use a little work.

It's been a long time since I had to come up with the terms to describe stuff like this, but you could try drawing things out a little bit? Set the scene a little and flesh characters out.  :)
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Jozana

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Re: [Story] Odds Against
« Reply #2 on: 25 Jul 2010, 12:16 »

Content-wise I like it a lot though, nice story. :)
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