The Ant War
"You rang the alarm bell, your Majesty ?"
"Yes. There is an Intruder. Observe."
"Ah, it is an ant, Majesty, they get into the Palace from time to time. They come from the gardens usually."
"These Incursions are Unacceptable. Summon the Chiefs of Staff."
"The Chiefs of Staff, Majesty?"
"These Ant Intrusions into the Palace are Unacceptable. I request Solutions. Grand Admiral, what is your Opinion?"
"I'm, err, not entirely sure anything in the Navy inventory would be of use here, your Majesty"
"I See. Field Marshal, what is your Analysis?"
"Well, I think the Admiral has forgotten the Navy has some rubber boats, I think he could set one up on the duck pond, for naval fire support."
"An Excellent Suggestion. Grand Admiral, you will command this Inflatable Boat."
"As you wish, your Majesty, however, may I point out that the Army has a fine Engineer Corps, who I am quite certain would be useful to contain the ant menace."
"Yes. Field Marshal, you will take Personal Command of the Engineers, and construct a Defensive Perimeter."
"I, err. Yes, your Majesty"
"The Grand Admiral looks quite solemn in his rubber boat on the duck pond, your Majesty."
"Yes, I believe it is because he Realises the Importance of his Duty."
"And the Field Marshal seems to be enjoying digging a trench around the palace."
"Yes. Exercise promotes Well Being. Healthy Body, Healthy Mind, Healthy Soul. It is Written."
"Indeed, your Majesty."
"There is a message from the Natural History Institute, your Majesty."
"What does it Say ?"
"It says that ants communicate with pheromones, and that they might be persuaded to move away from the Palace by careful placement of artificial ant pheromones."
"That is an Interesting Suggestion"
To Whom it May Concern:
By Order of Queen Synthia, the Armed Forces of Kaztropol will be holding a Parade, to commemorate the Victory in the Ant War.