Backstage - OOC Forums

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

The command division of the Angel Cartel is called the Dominations.

Pages: [1] 2

Author Topic: [Character] Xao Chu-Li  (Read 1530 times)

Xao Chu-Li

  • Guest
[Character] Xao Chu-Li
« on: 17 Apr 2013, 08:51 »

Xao Chu-Li

DED Registered Identification: Xao Chu-Li
Callsign: None
Birthname: Chu-Li Xao
Ethnicity: Jin-Mei
Date of Birth: YC 91.04.14 (Current Age: 24)
Place of Birth: Mui Fheng, Tei-Su (Mui Fheng City, Chandeille (Lirsautton V))
Parents: Chu-Li Yin (Father) and Chu-Li Wei (Mother)
Height: 5'9" / 175.26 cm
Weight: 149 lbs / 67.59 kg
Hair: Black (natural)
Eyes: Amber
Religious Affiliation: Undisclosed (AKA: work in progress)
National Affiliation: Gallente Federation
Political Affiliation: Hawk (Moderate)

Public Biographical History:

Chu-Li Xao was born into the lower tier of the Jing Ko caste (the lowest caste) in Mei Fheng city on Tei-Su (Lirsautton V). His birth would normally have had him laboring away for little gain and no recognition in order to bring prosperity and recognition to his Saan Go administrators and subsequently the Sang Do lord over Mei Fheng's third district.

His early childhood was marked by his family's financial struggles and a barely passable education. The most positive note of this period of Xao's childhood was his parents' unfailing faithfulness to one another and to him, though it would not be until later that he would show them his appreciation. When Xao was just entering his teenage years, he became involved in one of the many Jing Ko street gangs that plagued the grassland cities on Tei-Su, while violence was generally avoided, it was not rare.

Xao ended his education early in order to become involved in the Heishi gang, becoming an enforcer for collecting protection racket money and stealing food and other goods for his family. (Though, his parents were under the impression he was maintaining full time employ from a Saan Go patron). This deception lasted for nearly three years until Xao was fifteen.

It was at this point that Xao sustained grievous injuries when an attempted collection went awry through an ambush by an opposing gang. He was arrested on the scene by the local authorities and placed under medical care, which resulted in his parents being informed of the situation and eventually ascertaining the truth of his activities. The medical expenses for his injuries were too great for his parents to afford and the decision was made to pull him from medical support, which would have ended his life.

Were it not for the intervention of the district Sang Do lord, To-Shi Hueng. Desperate to save the life of their son, Xao's parents petitioned Hueng to consider their pleas and seek financial aid. The activities of their son (though criminal) intrigued Hueng, for the motivation behind them was provision for his family. In an unusual (but not unprecedented) move, Hueng offered to pay the medical expenses and draft Xao into his service. Xao's parents agreed without hesitation. (Becoming an employee to a Sang Do lord was considered a great honor, even under these circumstances.)

When Xao was discharged from the hospital, he was escorted to the estates of To-Shi Hueng and brought before the lord himself. He was to become an estate guard and use his understanding of the street gangs to help Hueng seek them out and disband them, in return his family would be provided for. Xao agreed and took to his new position with the same fervor and discipline he had demonstrated in his life as a member of the street gangs.

It didn't take long for Xao to distinguish himself among the lord's servants, and Hueng began to take a special interest in him. Hueng changed Xao's position to a retainer after only a short period of service and enlisted him in the education fit for a Sang Do. It was at this time that Hueng also began to teach Xao a form of personal combat that was passed down through his family; Sun Chie ((modern day Wing Chun)).

Xao underwent a dramatic change to personality and mind set during this time, becoming far more disciplined and respectful, slower to anger and refined. When Xao was twenty-four, his patron enlisted him in capsuleer training and charged him with continuing to serve the ideals and principles he had been taught. Xao graduated capsuleer training later that year and took to the stars, starting a new chapter in his life.
« Last Edit: 17 Apr 2013, 09:46 by Xao Chu-Li »
Logged

Xao Chu-Li

  • Guest
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #1 on: 17 Apr 2013, 08:52 »

Obviously this is still a work in progress and I'm looking for any feedback and ideas!
Logged

Halete

  • Egger
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 147
  • Just wants a friend...
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #2 on: 17 Apr 2013, 08:56 »

You mean to say this isn't a Malcolm alt?

I call BS on that.
Logged

Ché Biko

  • Space Buddho-Commu-Nihilist
  • Veteran
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1166
  • I'll face the stars or the abyss.
    • Biko's Backstage Character Thread
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #3 on: 17 Apr 2013, 09:23 »

Age: Either you miscalculated, or it could be clearer why his age is listed as 24 (like 'apparent age')
Bio:
Second paragraph: "he was show them" -> "he was [to] show them"
While I do not know the motivations of the lord To-Shi Hueng for doing so, I find it a little odd that he would take the initiative to contact Xao's parents to hear their pleas. It gives the lord a bit of a sadistic streak, in my opinion, so maybe reword that sentence.

For the rest its an interesting yet believable background and character. A solid foundation to build upon.
Logged
-OOChé

Halete

  • Egger
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 147
  • Just wants a friend...
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #4 on: 17 Apr 2013, 09:28 »

All things aside I find the concept very enjoyable, especially as it touches on an area that I am loathe to find in RP (Jin-Mei RPers who come through the caste system) but am very interested in.
Logged

Xao Chu-Li

  • Guest
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #5 on: 17 Apr 2013, 09:43 »

Age: Either you miscalculated, or it could be clearer why his age is listed as 24 (like 'apparent age')
Bio:
Second paragraph: "he was show them" -> "he was [to] show them"
While I do not know the motivations of the lord To-Shi Hueng for doing so, I find it a little odd that he would take the initiative to contact Xao's parents to hear their pleas. It gives the lord a bit of a sadistic streak, in my opinion, so maybe reword that sentence.

For the rest its an interesting yet believable background and character. A solid foundation to build upon.

Thank you so much for the feedback. Xao's parents actually went to Hueng, so I'll get that reworded. I did miscalculate the age, it should be YC 91, I'll get it fixed. Thanks!
Logged

Xao Chu-Li

  • Guest
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #6 on: 17 Apr 2013, 09:48 »

All things aside I find the concept very enjoyable, especially as it touches on an area that I am loathe to find in RP (Jin-Mei RPers who come through the caste system) but am very interested in.

Thanks! I'm goign to try and build upon the Jin-Mei world lore a bit, as there's really not much to work with. My main priority is making Xao believable and enjoyable, which is a bit harder than it sounds.
Logged

Ghost Hunter

  • Sansha's True Citizen ; TS-F Overseer
  • The Mods
  • Veteran
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 1374
  • True Power without limit!
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #7 on: 17 Apr 2013, 14:03 »

The reasons why he was put through Capsuleer training were not explored. Unless it was intentional to withhold those reasons. Otherwise, if you want it to be public, you will need to put some detail about what triggered his Capsule viability being discovered.
Logged
Ghost > So yes, she was Ghost's husband-
Ashar > So Ghost was a gay Caldari and she went through tranny surgery
Ghost > Wait what?
Ashar > Ghosts husband.
Ghost > No she was - Oh god damnit.

He ate all of them
We Form Moderation
For Nation

Xao Chu-Li

  • Guest
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #8 on: 17 Apr 2013, 14:08 »

They were intentionally left blank, but thanks for pointing it out in case I had simply overlooked it. :)
Logged

Adreena Madeveda

  • What's your favourite thing about space ?
  • Egger
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 125
  • Mine is space.
    • A Blog !
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #9 on: 17 Apr 2013, 15:34 »

I enjoyed the few moments I had with this character, and I really like the fact you feel he carries a whole culture with him, without ostentation -in my opinion, one of the hardest things to do in roleplay :)
Logged
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

Shakespeare, Macbecth

Seriphyn

  • Demigod
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 2118
  • New and improved, and only in FFXIV
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #10 on: 18 Apr 2013, 14:20 »

Xao Chu-Li
Guest

 :(
Logged

Adreena Madeveda

  • What's your favourite thing about space ?
  • Egger
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 125
  • Mine is space.
    • A Blog !
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #11 on: 18 Apr 2013, 15:05 »

It seems ArtOfLight is on an alt-spree. I'll make sure to tackle him down as soon as he starts delving in matarri waters.
Logged
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

Shakespeare, Macbecth

ArtOfLight

  • Retired Combat Pilot
  • Omelette
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 322
  • Bright Stars, Clear Horizons
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #12 on: 18 Apr 2013, 16:09 »

It seems ArtOfLight is on an alt-spree. I'll make sure to tackle him down as soon as he starts delving in matarri waters.

Not going to happen and the alt spree is done. It takes me a few cracks at characters until I settle on one I feel is developed and enjoyable enough for me to play well and play long term. I also suffer from being slightly indecisive and focusing too much on keeping my characters fun for those they interact with, which can cause me to be a bit of a flounder when I'm looking to start a new character.

However, I have settled on a character and have been playing him a bit, though remaining mostly quiet at the moment.
Logged
"A man's courage can be measured by what he does, his wisdom by what he chooses not to do and his character by the sum of both."

Adreena Madeveda

  • What's your favourite thing about space ?
  • Egger
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 125
  • Mine is space.
    • A Blog !
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #13 on: 19 Apr 2013, 03:51 »

It seems ArtOfLight is on an alt-spree. I'll make sure to tackle him down as soon as he starts delving in matarri waters.

Not going to happen [...]

:/ if I may be so bold.
But if yu've settled on a character you enjoy playing, it's all good :)
Logged
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

Shakespeare, Macbecth

Shintoko Akahoshi

  • Red Mom of War(?)
  • Pod Captain
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 540
  • Red Mom of War!
Re: [Character] Xao Chu-Li
« Reply #14 on: 19 Apr 2013, 12:18 »

I see Xao's in Doomheim now. No more Xao now? :(
Pages: [1] 2