I am a completely roleplay-centric player.
As such, in EVE's client, with EVE's communication systems, there is no reason for me to follow rules about having to have my character in a system physically, or a station, or what-have-you, to participate in roleplay. I cheerfully comply when a great many friends - or a few friends, or new people that seem interesting - require it, but if all it produces is some jumps through highsec and a string of text in the local memberlist, I'll make every effort to say 'fuck that' at some point.
With my best friends or my core roleplay group, we go with what's decided, and it's usually roleplay over specific rules of any given establishment. Now again, if we respect the channel owner, that's different.
As such, this already involves handwavin' in terms of my character not physically being where I put him or her through what I put forth to others in the game, and it is done because I'm sufficiently disciplined to create thoughtful ingame physical interaction without needing the crutch of the client to act as a random factor and create a variety of fair (or satisfying) outcomes in, say, a fight. But this isn't always satisfying, so I undock plenty when I'm playing hard.
And, my time is limited and my typing speed is fast, so I can usually justify splitting my attention to deal with simpler in-game mechanical actions (running a mission, or other PvE shit) while I'm roleplayan. It's important not to begrudge each other the chance to play the game you're paying for.
If things get too complicated to continue the roleplay, I might ask someone whose preferences are unknown to me there and then what they'd like to do. OOC communication on the small scale is the balm that heals all wounds, and coming up with an IC reason to table the subject for later is simple enough if one thinks on it.
On the whole, it mainly comes down to the question of convienence. Is it more convienent for you to use one convention, or the other? Usually, that in turn raises the question of greater comfort; if you figure out which one of these bothers your group less initially, you're good to go.