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Author Topic: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen  (Read 5267 times)

Tiberious Thessalonia

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #15 on: 22 Aug 2012, 13:11 »

I think the reaction here is a pretty good example as to why it shouldnt be done, really.  You stick something like that in a character's public backstory and it grows to consume everything else around it.  It doesn't matter how kickass everything else is, it can't hope to stand up to the weight of the rape backstory.

And since those are very rarely handled with any degree of sensitivity or subtlety, the automatic reaction is to go "This person is just looking for attention and accordingly I am going to ignore the shit out of the character" whether or not that is actually the case.
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Jennifer Bizen

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #16 on: 22 Aug 2012, 13:14 »

Sorry if it felt like we were hopping all over you for that one little thing.

I guess the thing is, we've seen situations where even when someone introduced something like that in their backstory, even if they handled it perfectly, someone else would turn around and make a mess of it. It was as much hoping not to leave you to fall into that kind of situation than anything else.

There´s no need in apologizing. I see both constructive criticism and advice in the above posts and the concept is still in progress and how I had imagine this specific coloring coming to effect on her personality, it can erased without changing how I envision her as whole. Besides, ridding it to avoid cliché is just a good thing in my opinion :3
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Tiberious Thessalonia

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #17 on: 22 Aug 2012, 13:15 »

I like you, by the way :)
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Jennifer Bizen

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #18 on: 22 Aug 2012, 13:31 »

I like you, by the way :)

\o/

ps: Just for the record, its not about looking for attention, its about detail even it isn´t common or public knowledge. A life is full of events that shape a person, wether it is to the negative or postive.
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Tiberious Thessalonia

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #19 on: 22 Aug 2012, 13:34 »

Oh, no, I get thats what you were going for, but I was just pointing out that the reaction is going to be strong regardless.

You took the constructive criticism and the obvious reaction, and made changes to how you handled it.  That is A Good Thing.
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Jennifer Bizen

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #20 on: 22 Aug 2012, 13:53 »

Oh, no, I get thats what you were going for, but I was just pointing out that the reaction is going to be strong regardless.

You took the constructive criticism and the obvious reaction, and made changes to how you handled it.  That is A Good Thing.

It is of course the whole point of sharing a concept, to get criticism, weighting pros and cons and make adjustments.
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hellgremlin

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #21 on: 22 Aug 2012, 14:36 »

The theme is one hell of a cliché in EVE, and I've never seen it done without inciting large amounts of drama. To toy around with it is considered in poor taste by a large number, too. "Oh, I need to make a Strong Woman. BEST HAVE HER RAPED TO CAUSE IT." is how it has come across, historically. Stecker pointed out the trauma of the event; throwing it in casually for a personality point isn't something that's particularly pleasant to see.

Born to a raped mother and an unknown father, Norapeica the Defiant had the misfortune of childhood on the Rape-Moons of Ymgarl XI. Enslaved in the rape mines, she had to battle roving rape gangs, run a gauntlet of rape-droids on the way to and from work, and could scarcely rest her head without being raped to sleep by dickwolves. Hardened by her years of rapement and counter-rapistry, she has become a capsuleer, and now rapes the spacelanes aboard her deadly battleship, Rapemaster McRape RapeRape Rapington Rapesworthy the Third.
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Kybernetes Moros

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #22 on: 22 Aug 2012, 14:52 »

Born to a raped mother and an unknown father, Norapeica the Defiant had the misfortune of childhood on the Rape-Moons of Ymgarl XI. Enslaved in the rape mines, she had to battle roving rape gangs, run a gauntlet of rape-droids on the way to and from work, and could scarcely rest her head without being raped to sleep by dickwolves. Hardened by her years of rapement and counter-rapistry, she has become a capsuleer, and now rapes the spacelanes aboard her deadly battleship, Rapemaster McRape RapeRape Rapington Rapesworthy the Third.

If only that wasn't worryingly close to some things I've seen. If only. :|
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Jennifer Bizen

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #23 on: 22 Aug 2012, 15:55 »

Born to a raped mother and an unknown father, Norapeica the Defiant had the misfortune of childhood on the Rape-Moons of Ymgarl XI. Enslaved in the rape mines, she had to battle roving rape gangs, run a gauntlet of rape-droids on the way to and from work, and could scarcely rest her head without being raped to sleep by dickwolves. Hardened by her years of rapement and counter-rapistry, she has become a capsuleer, and now rapes the spacelanes aboard her deadly battleship, Rapemaster McRape RapeRape Rapington Rapesworthy the Third.

Nicely put but not quite the direction I´m going for.
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Jev North

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #24 on: 22 Aug 2012, 17:55 »

Born to a raped mother and an unknown father, Norapeica the Defiant had the misfortune of childhood on the Rape-Moons of Ymgarl XI. Enslaved in the rape mines, she had to battle roving rape gangs, run a gauntlet of rape-droids on the way to and from work, and could scarcely rest her head without being raped to sleep by dickwolves. Hardened by her years of rapement and counter-rapistry, she has become a capsuleer, and now rapes the spacelanes aboard her deadly battleship, Rapemaster McRape RapeRape Rapington Rapesworthy the Third.

If only that wasn't worryingly close to some things I've seen. If only. :|

Yeah, so, for me this wasn't worryingly close but pretty much spot-on for a character application to the NWN PW I was playing at the time I've had the misfortune of being shown. Except the size of that one was closer to four pages of excruciating detail.

..sorry, didn't mean to do emotional processing in a completely unrelated thread.
« Last Edit: 22 Aug 2012, 17:57 by Jev North »
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Saede Riordan

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #25 on: 22 Aug 2012, 18:24 »

The theme is one hell of a cliché in EVE, and I've never seen it done without inciting large amounts of drama. To toy around with it is considered in poor taste by a large number, too. "Oh, I need to make a Strong Woman. BEST HAVE HER RAPED TO CAUSE IT." is how it has come across, historically. Stecker pointed out the trauma of the event; throwing it in casually for a personality point isn't something that's particularly pleasant to see.

Born to a raped mother and an unknown father, Norapeica the Defiant had the misfortune of childhood on the Rape-Moons of Ymgarl XI. Enslaved in the rape mines, she had to battle roving rape gangs, run a gauntlet of rape-droids on the way to and from work, and could scarcely rest her head without being raped to sleep by dickwolves. Hardened by her years of rapement and counter-rapistry, she has become a capsuleer, and now rapes the spacelanes aboard her deadly battleship, Rapemaster McRape RapeRape Rapington Rapesworthy the Third.

Hilariously, pathetically true in a few too many cases.
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Silver Night

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #26 on: 22 Aug 2012, 23:14 »

[mod]Let's keep it on topic, which is discussion of the character concept.[/mod]

ArtOfLight

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #27 on: 23 Aug 2012, 05:21 »

Personally, I really like the concept and the detail and thought you've put into the character (something I do as well)! I agree with pretty much all of the advice given so far and reiterate that, based on what I've seen of you so far, I believe you could handle it with maturity and realism - I doubt most others you will encounter could or would.

Looking forward to seeing where you go with her though!
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Halete

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #28 on: 23 Aug 2012, 05:37 »

Born to a raped mother and an unknown father, Norapeica the Defiant had the misfortune of childhood on the Rape-Moons of Ymgarl XI. Enslaved in the rape mines, she had to battle roving rape gangs, run a gauntlet of rape-droids on the way to and from work, and could scarcely rest her head without being raped to sleep by dickwolves. Hardened by her years of rapement and counter-rapistry, she has become a capsuleer, and now rapes the spacelanes aboard her deadly battleship, Rapemaster McRape RapeRape Rapington Rapesworthy the Third.

You just gave me my next character SUCKA.

...

Alright on topic.

I like the concept so far. I love the street-smart, hardened etc. route. It also gives you a good perspective/angle from which to explore. I'm interested to see where this character goes. If it's executed well there's a lot of potential.
« Last Edit: 23 Aug 2012, 07:56 by Hatele »
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Jennifer Bizen

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Re: My concept and ideas for Jennifer Bizen
« Reply #29 on: 23 Aug 2012, 08:34 »

A few further toyings with the concept with the help of extensive coffeeconsuming.
*The beginning
The shipwreck would most likely have been a transport of some kind, slave, prison, leisure. Its nothing that I´m determined on putting much detail into, the person finding the shipwreck might as well be dead or otherwise nowhere to be found.


*Origin.
Considering the shipwreck being on the border to the Great Wildlands, she could be of Thukker ancestry just as she might hail from any other race. Speculated but left undisclosed, left as a possible hook for fiction when time comes that she would dig into her origin.

*Adoption.
By Minmatar couple of any tribe or seperate tribe. Commoners of lower class. She will not know that she was an orphan until the death of her fosterparents when she would discover the adoption records.

*General education
As gathered from the timeline and considering how the schooling system works in my country, she would have started aprox a year ahead than she normally would have and finished one year earlier,  skipping over one grade but did not continue for college.

*Scarring, tattoos and gang involvement.
Her first gunshot wound would be simply due to having been at the wrong place at the wrong time, such as during a robbery at a shop or random shootout between the local rabble.
Seeing as its not uncommon for a teenager to become rebellious, she joined a local gang.
Second and third as well as other scarring would be from her time involved with a local gang, defending territory or other types of fighting.

*Capsuleer training through sponsorship of an unknown benefactor or drafted into the militia?
Could have opened her eyes more to the "worlds" outside of her home system. Opening doors that had been otherwise shut to her?
Curiosity in regards to this unknown benefactor and perhaps undergoing a search for him/her.
Minmatar militia, as previously noted interest for ooc-wise, she might be drafted or see something worthy to fight for as opposed to having been a gangmember in her past. Or that she may have been drafted for capsuleer program to fight for the Matari people. Or that she may have enlisted to get offworld- "Join the army, travel the world, meet interesting people and kill them!"

*The vastness of space and inexperience.
Instead of starting off as  a knowitall she could have been isolated to a point on her "home world" perhaps making the occasional contact with offworlders that paid visit to her hometown seeking stories of their travels and exploits or read about happenings in Minmatar space or simply none due to lack of interest.
Up until entering and finishing capsuleer training, she had never experienced space travel(as far as she would remember anyhow) and hence exploration beyond her homeworld would be considered new experiences.
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